[UA] Mall Adept

[Sean McGuinness]

When mall ninjas (a term I hadn't come across before) came up in the Enlightened Ninjutsu debate, I riffed off it for a not entirely serious character idea for a game I'm just about to be playing in.  One of the other guys said I should post it here.  So, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you:

The Mall Adept
 
Epideromancers are just, like, totally cool! 
They can kill people with a touch.  They can be anyone.  They' re
totally hardcore.  Look at these scratches!  If you piss me off, I'll,
like, totally melt your face off.
 
Bibliomancers just, like,
totally rock out!  With books!  I've heard they can slice your head off
with a single page.  And know anything!  I've got, like, a backpack
full of books, loaded and ready to kick arse!
 
Personamancers
are, like, totally rad.  They can be anyone, and wear freaky masks that
enable them to rip out your soul!  And I've been, like, making prank
phonecalls all day.  Watch out!
 
The mall adept knows just
enough about adepts to be dangerous, mainly to himself.  His only real
talent, outside of what his imagination assigns him at any given
moment, is the ability to find out about this stuff.  He tends to get
really excited about whatever the latest adept he's seen can do,
totally convinced that a) *this* is the true way to real, ultimate
power and b) he can use these powers, if he mimics what they're doing. 
And even if he was able to get past his goldfish attention span to
focus on just one school, he's about as magical as a house brick.  Not
that you'll ever convince him of that.
 "Disco is dead.  I should know - I wielded the hammer." 
- Rosalyn, Duchess of Vogue


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