[UA] Everdyne

[Royal Minister of Stuff]

Just finished reading Clive Barker's "Theif of Always"
so my wife will stop bugging me about it.

It's not a bad book, but it seems like two different
stories crammed end-to-end.  It inspired a UA
adventure/campaign which may have already been
covered.

Here's the latest iteration:

EVERDYNE
The Art of Becoming Corporate

The PCs need to become employees for the Everdyne
Corporation for this to work.  It would probably be
best to start out making characters around this
central concept, but you might be able to entice
normal Occultists into steady employment by a variety
of different means.  They could be hiding out from the
law, desperate for money or even curious about rumors
connected to the corporation.

No matter what, it's suspiciously easy to get a job at
Everdyne.  They'll take anybody and happily tell
prospective hires that supervisors are encouraged to
"diversify" or "target skills while offering
alternatives to otherwise undesireable qualities."

Recruits are shown a generous benefits package, an
eerily friendly environment (with no corporate
dresscode to speak of, "Sometimes we even come to work
in our PJ's" quips a chubby red-head.)

The corporation smacks of dishonesty, vice and some
kind of quiet desperation, but it also offers haven,
steady income (by no means high) and fairly easy work.

The PCs are hired to do "customer service" or
"technical service" or even "administrative support." 
All this consists of is sitting around in a cuble for
8 to 10 hours a day, playing solitaire on the computer
(or diddling with your own stuff) and picking up the
phone to answer inane questions or transfer callers to
higher powers.

Training is presided over by a young, energetic guy
who always wears jeans and a red t-shirt.  He
identifies himself as Robin and will let people out of
class on just about any dispute.  The players will no
doubt want to snoop around or slip out to do illegal
things and no one seems to care.  Sometimes, a
manager-looking person will ask who they are, but just
says "Oh" when told they're training.  They'll harrass
PCs who tend to be managers, but why go any further
than that?

Investigation doesn't reveal much more than two
stories of rented office building with the Everdyne
logo on almost every available surface.  Casual
conversation reveals a "Mr. Bridges" as the big boss. 
The names Belle (Azores), Charles "Chaz" Rene, Al
(Cotton) and Nick Knotts as important figures.

Almost everyone in the corporation has something to do
with the occult underground and many of them have some
infamy connected with their name.  Most employees act
weird, secretive and paranoid, but that's nothing
unusual for the OU.  Belle, Chaz, Al and Nick K. are
the only outgoing ones and will usually find the PCs.

Belle is beautiful, but in a Kate Moss kinda way.
She's always got a diet book or slim fast or other
weight control products close at hand.

Chaz seems chained to his desk, but is always sending
out helpful e-mails and inviting people out after work
(appointments he never keeps.)

Al wears very thick glasses and claims to be a dab
hand at DOOM and QUAKE (which he is.)  He's balding
and clumsy.

Nick K. is a charmer, a fast worker and the guy you go
to when something needs to be done NOW NOW NOW.  He
oozes salesman charms.

After a while, the four helpful upper managers begin
offering to help out with OU stuff, when they can pry
the interests out of the, probably, distrustful PCs.

They display a variety of powers, including
flesh-molding artifacts, strange rituals and shadowy,
half-seen contacts.  They attempt to alter the PCs as
often as possible, always making sure to change them
"back" again afterwards. 

Things begin looking up for the PCs, they're offered
company housing until they accept and someone is
ALWAYS throwing a pizza party or sales celebration or
a pot luck.

Meanwhile, the PCs keep glimpsing half-human figures,
hearing whispers and knowing, just knowing, that
something funny is going on here.

It is, of course, but it's too late.

The corporation itself is a huge, hungry entity named
Mr. Bridges, a fairy tale troll who likes in the
company logo.  He does not eat employees unless he has
to, but, rather, turns them into monsters who will go
out and find the kind of victims he prefers: tender
children or virgins or whatever.  He destroys their
hopes with cheap, easy-to-afford crap that burdens
their lives and then sends monsters to collect them
when they inevitably get in credit over their heads.

The four helpful upper managers are, of course,
inspired by Richtus, Jive, Marr and Carna as well as
the fairy tale motiff of four helpful strangers with
weird powers.

Belle A., the nail-thin blonde, can swallow anything
(but eventually has to throw it back up.)

Chaz. R can run to the ends of the earth and back when
he's not chained to his desk (maybe he's an avatar of
the Pilgrim.)

Al C.'s thick glasses keep his powerful eyes from
seeing "anywhere in the world" and he can hit anything
he aims at when he takes them off.

Nick K. is just a generic devil and really Nick
Knottnothing (Rumplestillskin.)

Anyway, there's your urban fantasy fairy tale for tonight.

=====
-- Rp Bowman, Royal Minister of Stuff
The Electronic Nation of Yokeltania:
http://www.geocities.com/yokeltania/

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