[UA] Would you like gas with those fries?...was Ears, nostrils, mouth, eyes . . . hm, needs one more hole . . .

[Stevens Dustin]

>     A little adventure idea: A bizarre serial
> attacker is gassing people in
> their homes and while they're paralyzed, he comes in
> and drills a hole in
> their skulls.  Why?  See above.

Not to hi-jack the thread I just hi-jacked but that
sounds like the Mad Gasser of Matoon (granted, he
wasn't a trephinationist [is that a word? {let's see I
only have one more set of parantheses left...<hope
this doesn't screw up your html>}]).

Basically, sometime in the 40s the town of Matoon,
Illinois, was suffering from a grip (a fistful?) of
fear. People believed a strange fellow (described as
somewhat inhuman, kind of like a troll, I think) was
sneaking up to houses late at night, pumping in a
sweet-smelling paralyzing gas via a tube through any
open-windows. He mostly targeted single women. The
police never found any evidence at all that he
existed, but that didn't stop people from seeing him,
and finding themselves paralyzed in the middle of the
night. Eventually the whole thing was chalked up to
mass hysteria. The Mad Gasser usually shows up in
paranormal texts nowadays, usually in conjunction with
Springheel Jack or the Jersey Devil.

So here's my quick brainstorm of the Mad Gasser:

--he's a golem, whose been assigned the task of
pumping this gas into sleeping people's homes by his
former (now dead) master. A splinter faction of Max
Attax gain control of him, equip him with (along with
his gas pumper), a drill, a bunch of plugs, and a
bunch of little featureless homunculi in a jar. You
got it, he's popping homunculi into people's heads. Go
ahead and decide what they are doing in there (making
people hungry for fast-food, of course).

--the Mad Gasser is heir to a long-line of wackos who
suffer from a weird genetic fetish: paralyzing people.
The current Mad Gasser, a short hairy school bus
driver, has, on top of his genetic predisposition,
another uncontrollable impulse: re-arranging
furniture. Right now, in your hometown, he's gassing
people, then rushing into their living rooms arranging
furniture in weird occult patterns (putting couches on
end with the TV at the top set to channel 32, etc). 
And leaving semen stains on the floor to boot.

--people aren't being paralyzed, they're having
visions. The whole episode is actually occurring on
another plane of existence that is touching down on
our reality (the Statosphere?). The Mad Gasser doesn't
really exist, people just rationalized him into
existence, since they also rationalized that they're
being gassed. That's why nobody has heard of the Mad
Gasser in so long: everyone today assumes the gas is
just on (or the Gas Company is pumping it in). Of
course, being paralyzed and in another dimension is
probably not a good thing.

Anyway, chuck 'em or use 'em

Steve Dustin
zoom2baba at yahoo.com


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