[UA] Re: I'm stuck

[Michael D. Mearls 97]

--- Gregory Paul Stolze wrote:
At 11:56 PM 12/06/1999 +0100, Mario Magallanes wrote:
>There is some stuff about Saint-Germain and "The Purple Flame" or
>something like that in Internet (I did a search on the Comte once;
>strangely enough, I found an entry about a festival that didn't seem to
>be related to my search)

Oooh... sounds like a plot hook to me, baby!
--- end of quote ---

That gives me an idea for a modern day ritual (I hope this is coherent. I am
deathly ill with a cold from hell and groovin' on SleepyTyme-style cough
syrup):

Bring the Noise

This ritual, which undoubtedly once had a quaintly old fashioned name, makes
researching any topic a Herculean task for its victim. The books the victim is
after are checked out or out of stock, or the library's card catalog is
completely out of order, or the electronic card catalog crashes as soon as the
victim tries to access it, etc. The ritual got its current name from its effect
on Internet searches. Search engines return thousands of completely useless
sites (signal to noise ratio, get it?). Even hierarchically organized catalogs,
such as Yahoo, will not work for the victim. Relevant links will either return
404 errors or will link to completely unrelated pages.

The victim can attempt to get someone else to research the topic for him.
However, his helper must make a successful Soul check or he misunderstands the
research request and comes back to the victim with a fresh pile of useless
research on a completely unrelated topic. This also applies to questioning
others about a topic. The questioned person will mishear the victim and give
him plausible, though incorrect answers. Example: ask someone "Where's Joe
Bloggs?", and they'll hear "Where's Sammy Smith?"

This ritual is not without its limits. First, it only lasts for a week after it
is cast. Second, and unknown to most people toting this ritual, Internet
searches have a frightening tendency to return pages related to the caster,
though related links are mired within pages upon pages of garbage links. When
the victim attempts an Internet search, a successful Soul check will yield
results that can be linked to the caster, though the victim will have to spend
an hour or two wading through the links.

Using this ritual is no small undertaking. First, handwrite backwards a book at
least 200 pages in length (it helps to write in really big letters). Then, drip
6 drops of the victim's blood on the thirteenth page of the backwards tome and
spend two significant charges. Once this is done, the victim must open the
book. Once the book is open, the ritual goes into effect for one week.

Obviously, this ritual is pretty risky, since it puts the caster at serious
risk for getting tracked down. As Dirk Allen says, you've just tossed a drink
in a guy's face. Better have something a bit punchier to back it up.

(Maybe I'm cruel, but this could be loads of fun to stick on Library Use
obsessed characters, especially if they try to get some poor schmuck to help
them.)

Is there a pornomancy spell that does something like this? Like I said, I'm on
cough syrup and a littled addled. I've already mistaken my Airport base station
(wireless network hub thingy) for my computer's trackball three times this
morning.

- M.

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