[UA] Gulf War Syndrome, Diet Pepsi, and Snopes.com

[Greg Stolze]

Heard a great urban legend the other day.  Supposedly, the artificial
sweetener aspartame isn't safe if it's been heated above 86 degrees
Farenheit -- it turns into formaldehyde and then decomposes into formic
acid.  In the first Gulf War, many loads of Diet Pepsi were left out in the
sun, they got hot and, when soldiers drank a lot of them, they caused Gulf
War Syndrome!

(Then I had to spoil it all by looking it up on Snopes.com,
http://www.snopes.com/toxins/aspartame.asp -- but it was fun while it
lasted.)

Now: Assuming that some ingredient in sodas (maybe those Islamic branded
sodas being sold in the Arab world to give thirsty muslims an alternative
to heathen drinks like Coke and Pepsi) really DID break down and unleash
toxic byproducts, how do we use this as a red herring in UA?

I recommend something like, "College punkass buys a case of this goo for
its camp value and brings it back from a trip overseas, along with an Osama
Bin Laden poster.  Then he and his room mates all start to get sick.  Is it
because of their creepy neighbor lady with her twenty cats?  The lividly
angry sophomore whose uncle died in the 9/11 attacks?  Or is it just that
they're renting a house that was built on an old indian burial ground and
they've urinated in the sink one time too many?"

-G.

Only the character with Cat Lore 55% knows for sure.