[UA] Re: [OT] Reference?

[Timothy Toner]

  ----- Original Message ----- 
  From: Stuart Anderson 
  To: ua at lists.uchicago.edu 
  Sent: Tuesday, December 12, 2000 2:14 PM
  Subject: Re: [UA] Re: [OT] Reference?


   Now he's kind of a crusty old Irascimancer who puts lippy aspiring writers in their place during Q&As at World Horror Con appearances. I guess he has Epstein-Barr, so it's hard for him to back the enormous projects he used to, or work at the insane pace he used to. Consequently, he's built up this bizarre anti-fan following that resent the fact that he's not writing the incredibly cool stuff he *ought* to be. (There has to be some UA magick potential in that somewhere) 

My friend, attending the San Diego ComiCon ran afoul of Ellison's tremendous Ego.  Ellison had written the foreword to a collection of Sandman issues (Seasons of Mist), and my friend, who was trying to get Frank Miller to sign something, noticed no line in front of Ellison.  He had the book in his hand, so he walked over to Ellison with one of those metallic markers.  Getting something autographed with a metallic ink pen is the ultimate expression of the collector psyche.  It tells the autographer that you really don't care what the inks, which bleed through everything, will do to the book.  It's more important to get the book personalized.  Besides, it looks really cool.  He handed the book to Ellison (which is a beautiful hardcover, BTW, and has 'foreword by Harlan Ellison' right on the book), who tossed it back to him.  
    "I didn't write this."  
    "You wrote the foreword."  My friend opens the book, and shows him the foreword.  
    Ellison scowls.  "So?"
    "I thought it was very insightful."  He went on to describe exactly what he liked about it, signifying that he had, indeed, read the foreword, and knew why he wanted this man to sign his book.
    Ellison's still scowling.  A crowd has begun to form behind my friend.  Once he knows he has an audience, he lays into my friend for being a stupid motherfucker for using this kind of pen to get autographs.  "Don't you know what this will do to the book?"   Each word gets louder and louder.
    "Sure," my friend said.  "I just think it would be better to have your signature in it."
    Ellison continues to denigrate him, uncaps the marker, and proceeds to turn to random pages in the book, scribbling on them.  After he's done, he tossed the book back, keeps the pen, and tells my friend to get the hell out of there.  No signature.
    Well, my friend took the book, more than a little bit disgusted, and the crowd broke into cheers.  Indeed, Harlan had 'schooled' yet another fanboy.  Indeed.  For the rest of the Con, whenever Harlan caught sight of my friend, he'd jeer him from across the room, as long as he had a convenient audience.  Of course.
    I don't think it's fandom's testiness that the master doesn't work his magic anymore.  I think it's frustration on the master's part that he can't draw 'em like he used to, and instead of raising himself up by the quality of his own work, he chooses to increase his fame by belittling others.  He's a sad, mean little man.  
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